Lia DeLand, MS, CTRC

I have been many things, a spiritual counselor; a student; a home-schooling mom; a traveler; an adventurer; a friend; a writer; a mystic…

I was a state-licensed therapist for many years and am now certified as a Trauma Recovery Coach by the International Association for Trauma Recovery Coaching. I have worked in community counseling clinics, Juvenile Hall, the counseling center at the University of North Carolina School of the Arts, the Trauma Center in Boston, and a therapeutic boarding school in Costa Rica for American adolescents.

I’m also a surviver of emotional, physical, and sexual abuse.

Soulwork

I do soulwork: facing our fears, listening to our hearts, comforting the sad, scared little children that have been shut in our inner closets, bringing compassion to our weak and vulnerable parts, discovering that we are deeply worthy, becoming free of all that has weighed us down, becoming fully human.

My childhood was a nightmare. My own personal repertoire of survival strategies included: disappearing myself; being a good girl and an overachiever; being perfect; taking care of myself and never asking anyone for help; intense self-criticism; being whoever others wanted me to be; taking on the responsibility to fix everyone; being nice; and constant worrying that someone must be angry at me. The result was migraines, anxiety, depression, and believing something was wrong with me. In my mid-30’s I couldn’t think of any good reason to live. When I hit 40, I felt like a fragile porcelain doll, cracked and broken, held together with barbed wire.

Someone introduced me to a therapy group for women who had been molested as children and I began the long healing process. It was transformational. I began questioning everything I believed about myself and relationships. I slowly became clearer and stronger, more rooted in myself, less fearful. After a few months I was able to stand up (although shaking and terrified) to abusive people in my life and tell them they couldn’t treat me like that anymore. After 18 months I felt a new, strange feeling in my gut. Two days later I finally figured out what it was: joy.

IFS Therapy

The transformative process was so empowering I went back to school. The counseling classes were fascinating but I was frustrated with all the various therapeutic orientations. There were bits and pieces of them that I liked but none of them, as a whole, felt “right.” Then one day I read a description of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, and something exploded inside me. It described how it really felt inside my head and how to heal all the junk in there. This would work.

And now…I’ve been working with people who want to be free for over twenty-five years. I hold a Master’s of Science degree (cum laude) in Psychology with a Counseling concentration. I also hold a Bachelor’s degree in English and Creative Writing from Stanford University. I love learning new things. I have received training in IFS therapy (Level 2), Sound Healing, Brainspotting, hypnotherapy, Reiki, Heart Assisted Therapy, neurofeedback, hospice work, and meditative practices. I’ve used vision questing to expand my awareness of and strengthen my connection to deeper aspects of myself.

Many of the people who come to me would resonate with this statement:

“It is clear you are on a path marked by intense practical engagement in what really matters in order to set your life, your body and your relationships straight. A slow steady stability creeps in thoroughly established in just yourself – a foundation which is unimpeachable.” (Jaqueline Hobbs, Oracle Girl)